This is a collection of thoughts and opinions from various posts that I have overall made into general statements. There are not studies referenced in this blog post.
Every day at one point or another I sit and scroll. I look at pictures, quotes, videos and everything else other mommas feel like documenting and sharing at the time. I always keep in mind this is what other mommas want us to see, want us to read about at that time…it’s not everything that goes on so I take it with a grain of salt, but I do find a lot of content at one point or another to be relatable and true. Of course some of it triggers my brain to wonder, think and explore.
So, in this shorter blog post I wanted to share a few things I’ve complied about what I see mommas miss, or wish they had. Please keep in mind this is just from various posts that I have generalized, and base mainly from a stay-at-home mom’s point of view.
Feel free to chime in, add your comments and let me know what is something else you would want more of…or something you miss you don’t get much of.
A Few Things of What Some Mommas Want
Adult Interaction – As a SAHM especially – being home and talking to kids all day…with very little adult interaction, going out, coffee dates, spouse dates and just enjoying the outdoors with adults will be nice! Sometimes stay-at-home moms feel so secluded that anyone that asks how we are will get a full story in a matter of minutes! I’ve seen so many jokes about this all I can do is laugh because I can understand it from this perspective.
Photos Of Us – As women and mommas in general, we love getting photos of our kids and our family…but we sometimes feel like we don’t get that same attention. Remember how in the beginning you use to take so many pictures of your spouse and they would take pictures of you. Then life kinda happened and now you are scrambling to get the house together, get you together and keep it together and there aren’t those little moments like there use to be? Now when there’s an event like a birthday party or family get together you are getting all the photos and no one stops to get photos of you either alone or with the family? It can suck looking back at, like damn, where are the pics with me…oh, wait I was the one taking them, silly me. Yeh, there are a lot of mommas that actually miss this. It’s small to some, but big to others.
Having Others Check On Us – We are (a lot of times) checking on others, reaching out, calling, emailing if needed…to see how our friends and family are doing. But there are a lot of moments where we don’t feel like we are checked on. At some point it gets exhausting to keep doing, so there will come a time and place when we stop checking on others, only to really see how many will check back on us.
A Reason To Get Dressed – This comes from the SAHM perspective again…there are a lot of sahms online that talk about getting dressed up to go no where, and I myself, even joke about it. But…there comes a time where we really do want a reason to get dressed up. It’s just a nice change, even if it’s simple, like heels and a pair of jeans, it’s something that we don’t get to enjoy (maybe like we use to). After becoming a stay-at-home mom I did get to the point of letting myself go…and one day I found myself being super judgy and comparing myself to what I was seeing online, only to have a serious conversation with myself and say “how are you comparing and getting upset when you aren’t even putting any effort in”. I got my sh*t together and started putting time into me again. Making me feel good for me, so that the energy I was giving was better, not just for me, but for my family. It’s ok to have moments, as long as we recognize, address and admit to them.
Being Able To Vent – Just because we are SAHM’s doesn’t mean we don’t have anything to say. We can have a lot to say and no one to say it to that will listen. Sometimes we might feel like our vents aren’t taken as serious or…that no one cares, but we care about it and we are passionate about our feelings. We just want to feel heard and seen, and don’t want to feel like just because we stay home all day we don’t have anything of substance to discuss.
In closing, I will just say if you are a fellow momma and some of these things resonate with you, talk about it, let’s normalize these feelings and thoughts. There’s nothing wrong with them, we are all human, we are women with a ton of emotions that flow through us at various times. The more it’s discussed the more others will begin to understand where we are coming from and things will start to change.