08 Jan One thing I left in 2020- Mom Guilt
Hey mama! Does mom guilt have a tight grip on you?
Well I have 5 tips to help you loosen that tight a$$ grip and shake it off for good!!!
Ok so let me break it down for the 1% of moms who aren’t familiar with or have ever experienced this horrible feeling called mom guilt.
Mom guilt that awful feeling of not doing enough as a parent, not doing things right, or making decisions that you think may screw your kids up in the long run.
Last year has been a crazy year for all of us whether you’re a mom or not. Momin’ in 2020 has showed me that I’m not the only one who struggles with life as a working mom who is quarantined with 2 school aged kids while also running a new business, being a devoted wife and still finding “me time”. Whew! Momin’ for me was a balancing act before 2020 & quarantine life just took it to a whole other level!
What I’ve also learned is that parenting is not actually hard. Ok here me out! It’s about understanding your family’s needs and desires and making the best decision for your children. It’s about asking for help and not trying to do it all on your own. We tend to try this and some of us fail miserably. (My hand is raised) I’m not trying to be a supermom. Just a real mom, who loves her kids with all her heart and wants the best for them.
I’ve come to terms with not having it all together as a mom. Like, who does, really?
So why do we even feel mom-guilt?
Because we think we can do it all on our own and still have time to ourselves for a little r&r and sometimes that isn’t realistic. We find ourselves comparing our parenting style with some stranger on Instagram. We beat ourselves up for making some mistakes or simply for making the right decision that others may not agree with. That has to stop now! Repeat after me mamas: “I am enough. The decisions I make are what’s best for my family. I don’t need to be labeled “supermom”; and it’s ok if I make mistakes. I’ll be ok.” Ok so now that we got that straight. Let’s talk about how to let go of mom guilt for good.
Here’s my top 5 tips for living a guilt-free mom life in 2021 and beyond:
Do what’s best for you and your family. Stop comparing your situation to moms you see or hear about. Trust yourself enough to know whatever decision you make is best for you.
Give yourself permission to take a break
Practicing self care for me is taking a break. Have you ever seen that graphic tee with the slogan “Tired as a mother”? Yeah well that’s the story of my life! I’m tired!! I know I’m not the only one. And honestly, there’s days I don’t wanna hear anyone calling me “mommy”. Especially when I’m tired! My kids have gotten the worst parts of me when I’m tired. I get frustrated easily, I snap, I yell, I’ve even rolled my eyes (forgive me Lord) at my kids when they’re just being two needy kids who just want to be catered for.
Show yourself grace
There’s no such thing as a perfect mom and the term “Super Mom” gets thrown around a lot. Look, I don’t want to be known as a supermom. I don’t want to do it all!! And I definitely don’t want to be the one to “save the day”! Nope, I’ll pass.
Ask for help
I’m sure you’ve heard of the old adage, it takes a village to raise a child. It’s the truth. We can’t do it on our own. Unfortunately, some mamas do. But, if you can help it, don’t be that mama! Be the mama who asks for some help. Speak up and let your support system know you are struggling and need it. Or, if you don’t have a support system in your home or near, reach out to a trusted friend and let them know you’re struggling. I always believe that if you ask you shall receive. Not everyone knows your situation until you present it, and what can come from that can be the blessing you need.
And last but not least…
Embrace the hard
Being a mom is hard work. Embrace it. Our journey as a mom is always evolving. We only get better with time and challenges help us grow. I wanna grow with my kids and I love how much they teach me about myself and life. Listen and learn from those lessons and embrace the journey. You’ll really appreciate those easier days when you’re not fighting against the hard ones.
That’s it, mamas. That’s all I got. Let me know if you have any other tips to add to the list. I’m sure the mamas reading this can use them. Here’s to no more mom-guilt in 2021! We got this, mamas!
Cheers to an amazing 2021 without the mom-guilt!
Featured Momma – Adrianne Munroe
A little bit about me: I’m a wife & mom of two boys: 7 and 5 year old little rascals as I playfully call them. (They love that movie by the way). I’m also a career woman and an entrepreneur. I’m a health coach and personal stylist helping women achieve optimal health and helping them dress for success! I just turned 41 and I feel like I’m just starting to live my best life doing what I love and making self care a priority in my life! Prior to having kids, self care was one of my top priorities. That changed when the hectic days of mom life got in the way. Now I feel like I’m back to that sweet place and feeling so much better and as a result, my relationships with my family and loved ones has also improved.
Find me on Instagram @adriannemunroe and let’s connect!