Do you feel like you get frustrated easier now then before the pandemic started shutting everything down? Are you more emotional? Do you feel like screaming when you feel like you aren’t understood? Do you try to hide around the house and still haven’t mastered getting a few minutes of peace? Am I the only one asking and even thinking these thoughts?
Sometimes I feel like I am just tired of being tired of trying to figure out when this will all feel somewhat normal again, how will I get through another day of school work, house work, mental work, self time, family time, dog time, spouse time, and all the other “times” I try to have each day. How is it all possible? Better yet, how the hell do us moms seem to figure this out day in and day out. Women have this incredible talent of multi-tasking and getting sh*t done, then breaking down completely in a bathroom without anyone knowing…Ok, I won’t say ALL women, but I know a lot of women that can do this without others knowing anything is wrong at all. I’m not saying its the best coping strategy, I am just saying it happens. It’s just what we do. We put on a brave face, sound chipper and jolly while we encourage the kids to have a great virtual school day, give positive affirmations and words of encouragement, make snacks that look like art and present it to them (after taking a photo for Instagram to post) while we whisper “what the f*ck” under our breath as we walk out the room.
Our kids aren’t the only ones that will have a lot of psychological impacts from the pandemic and shut downs of the schools. Us moms have a ton of shit we carry with us each day schools stay closed, each day we are forced to stay and work from home while juggling kids doing virtual learning or, in some cases, have to sacrifice working all together to help assist in virtual learning because hiring a sitter is too expensive and we don’t have any relatives that are available to help watch the kids all day while we work. How do you not become an emotional mess having to deal with all that month after month after month with no expiration date for Covid in sight.
I use to get upset at myself for getting emotional and crying and worrying, but now I am more emotional when I get frustrated faster at our son when he’s frustrated trying to learn. I have to remind myself this isn’t normal and it’s ok…Sometimes I have to stop and remind him, mommy (well mom now, since he doesn’t want to call me mommy) I am learning with you because I am not a teacher and this way of learning is different then when I grew up. Especially some of this crazy ass math, that makes you do twenty extra steps just to get to the answer you could get to in the two steps you learned when you were little. But that topic is for another post, because I can’t begin to get into it now.
Emotions are just a part of a woman’s genetic. But the pandemic and the shut down of schools has tapped in to a whole other level of emotions. I can only imagine how many virtual therapists are booked and busy during these times. I pray for the families that encounter or experience domestic abuse during these times, I cry out for the kids that have to figure school out by themselves while their parents or caregivers work and can’t stay home so they are left alone. There are so many more heartbreaking situations today because of the pandemic. The question I continue to ask myself is what’s the best way to deal with my emotions considering everything we are facing. What’s yours?
The Expressive Mom 